the stakes

“WE’RE THE SPIDERS! YOU’RE THE FLIES!” they shouted as they laughed and chased me from the scorching desert into the shadowy ravine.

I was running on all fours, bounding from one wall of the narrow fissure to the other trying to dodge the nail gun. I felt one slam into my shoulder and knock off the metal bowl I was wearing for armor. I spun and arched my back as the crunch of boots sprinting through sand and grit grew louder. A couple of Spider gangers trotted in, blocking my exit. One of them had clammy yellow skin. A ghoul. He was carrying a stick with a sharp bird beak wrapped at one end as a weapon. The other one had his face wrapped up, but I’m sure he was human. That was the bastard with the nailgun. I shoved my paws into the loose dry dirt and pulled out the rusty machete I hid there last night.

“Oh clever manimal he is!” taunted the ghoul. “Y’claws ain’t enough? I got me own!” That was true. Even in this mutated form I still didn’t grow claws. Not that they’d come close to being as nasty as those bony bloody fingers the ghoul was stretching. Ghoul-boy flicked his tongue like a snake. “Let’s have at it then!”

I let out a deep roar that echoed through the ravine. That’s when the rest of the kids pushed themselves out of the nooks and crannies in this rocky passageway. They were all the same dry red clay color from their camouflage. The three kid gangs were always chasing each other off, but we had a common threat. So I was able to get them all to hid in one place, and armed to the teeth.

“We’re onto you!” I pointed at the two Spiders. “Luring kids into your parlor or whatever you call it with a trail of candy! You! You’re a ghoul...I’m not judging you for WHAT you eat. But when you don’t gnaw on people your own size...you’re gonna PAY. But YOU!” I pointed at the guy with the nail gun. “Corwin is it? Corey? Doesn’t even matter because you...and your undead buddy right here...are officially SCRAPPED!”

Bleue and her NPAKs - the older kids - laid in with the missiles. Crossbows, nailguns, and I think I even heard some gunpowder. Those two bastards dropped pretty fast. Once they ran out of ammo then Kira...I mean...Kira junior...just call her Sprog... and her Runts moved in with their spiky clubs to make sure they weren’t playing dead. Finally the youngest contingent...Pea and her Sand Brats...moved in with their knives and cleavers. I looked away for this part.

That’s when I heard the scream.

“Mistah Koen! Mistah Koen!” I was still getting used to being called Mister. But in the Wastelands when you’re sixteen you’re practically middle-aged.

“The ghoul bit Ryan!”

“OH HOLY...!”

I rushed over. The two spiders were...well, out of commission. But Ryan...shit, he’s just this little blond boy with bad teeth, kinda Russian accent. Always hyper, But now he was lyin’ still. Bad sign. I started wiping down my blade.

“I’m sorry kid, but we’re gonna have to ampu...tate...?”

The bite was on his neck. That wasn’t gonna work. And he was already getting jaundiced.

“Aw crap...no no no not you Ryan not YOU...”

I’ve gotten used to a lot of crap in the Wastelands. Humans eating each other. A robotic landlord named Neobrokrug that didn’t care if you lived or died. A robot ice cream truck that still gave out ice cream. But the ghouls still scared the shit outta me. I knew a couple that didn’t attack living folks on sight, but still it’s a horrible way to exist.

Pea stood behind me, looking down at him.

“Pea?” I asked. “He’s gonna turn. He’s one of yours...if you guys wanna put him out of his misery you better...”

And that’s when the ground started to shake. Boulders started falling into the ravine. We were blinded by a cloud of dirt and sand.

“EVERY KID FOR HIMSELF!”

But of course that’s not what happened. We all huddled together crying and screaming. Well I wasn’t crying and screaming. Well it was so noisy it was hard to tell... By the time got the grit out of my eyes I could see the sunrise. Wait...we’re in a damn ravine...where the HELL is the sun coming from? Hmm, the end of the ravine opened up. What is this, a crater?

“Mistah Koen? I think that’s Neo...”

I’ll be damned if it wasn’t. Imagine a skinny robot made of junkyard scrap, with a fake plywood cube over one hand and a dented army helmet. That’s Neobrokrug. You never saw the guy unless he was collecting rent, smacking someone down for illegal weapons or...

“Aw shit he's pulling in more Wastelands!”

Remember how I said this place was an ashcan for destroyed cities? Somewhere in time a city is on the brink of annihilation. It’s Neo’s job to rescue...well maybe preserve is a better word...a good chunk of it before disaster wipes it off the map. He was surrounded by cobbled-together machinery that looked even dicier than him. Bleue pulled out her binoculars and peered down the crater.

“Koen. You really need to see this.” She passed the binocs to me.

“The girl in the pink dress?” Bast, she was dressed like one of my dad’s clockwork dolls.

“To the right of her.”

Some kinda flashing light...it was a battle. Some giant robot with scraggly beard and hat like a Jaegermonster...and a guy in a soldier’s uniform fighting him. Aether saber....medic’s belt...aether goggles...mustache...

“Holy crap that’s my DAD!”

I lowered the binocs, trying to make sense of what I just saw. Were we back in the Steamlands? No, this was an overlap. A huge chunk of the Steamlands was on its way to us. Everybody knew about the Caldon remnant. That was one of the first regions that made up this hellhole. Finally enough of the dust cleared that I could make out the outline of the city on the horizon.

“OH SWEET BAST!!! THAT’S NEW BABBAGE!!!”